Pregnancy Post 22

And so I start my 12th week. Can I get an AAAAA-MEN!!

This week I have two appts...super fun. Thankfully the permanent twice weekly appts won't start until my last trimester, so I have a wee bit of freedom.

The widget is doing just fine in there...Monday I was 11 weeks and 6 days, and that's exactly how I measure at my ultrasound. Spot on. I also went to the gym for the first time yesterday, and did just fine, which felt fantastic. I was so relaxed on the way home I almost fell asleep. Nice. Tonight I think I'll try and zumba or something at home. See how that goes.


August 15th is the big day -- the day we find out if it's a boy or a girl. I can't wait. I think we may have even picked both full names for a boy and a girl, but I am not spreading the word until we find out the sex. But Richie hasn't told me lately that my hormones are making me pick crazy names, which facilitated negotiations.

Fell asleep last night listening to Richie tell me about his morning at the park with Bellamy. She played with a group of kids, and was taller than both the 3 year old girl and  5 year old boy. They talked about shoes, and played hide and seek. I love that kid. He sent me a picture of her on the slides and her legs look ten miles long. She's so grown up! It's ridiculous.Some days  I can't imagine loving another baby as much as Bellamy, but I know I will. Does that sound awful? Maybe. But it's a thought that's occurred to me alot lately.

For now, I am going to work.

Pregnancy Post 21

BAD DREAMS.

holy hell.

I wish they would just go away.

In other news, I think I have turned the corner on the vomiting, and then ended up dehydrated. Thought  I was getting a kidney stone or some such  nonsense, and it turns out 100 + ounces of water a day just isn't enough right now, and I need replenish with powerade type drinks. Bleh. But my back pain is getting better, which is good.


I also dropped my edu class for next semester this week, which leaves me with my last math course. I was a little sad to prolong my time @ TMCC, but one more semester there won't kill me. I am honestly trying to mastermind a way to do that class in the spring while I am on maternity leave, thus giving me more time to stay @ my job. I think I could make it happen.

For right now, I am finally calming down from my stupid dream, feeling sleepy, and want to take a nap before I have to get ready for work.

Pregnancy Post 20

After feeling as though I was going to throw up the baby and every other part of my insides on Monday...things have been strangely calm.

My twenty minute cat naps after dinner are starting to fuck with me. As now I am the only one awake even though I am exhausted, and tomorrow will be my busiest day at work. Oh well. I came up with a game plan for punky b's 3rd birthday extravaganza, started a little project for the playroom I have been putting off, and have a few other things in mind now. PRODUCTIVITY. Sweet.

I keep saying I am returning to the gym, and then I vomit some more, but I think this weekend might really be the ticket.  I might sleep for 3 hours after, but I am determined to start werkin' on my fitness again. I haven't been since the week I figured out I was all knocked up, and I really want to keep moving. Plus if our Halloween plans stick, I need to be able to wear some hotpants, prego belly and all, so my legs need to be banging. Here's hoping.

Pregnancy Post 19

After several days of reining in the urge to vomit...i couldn't contain it any more and ended up spending the greater part of my morning in the bathroom at work. Also left early for the first time to come home and curl up on the couch in a near comatose state.

The other fun part of the morning sickness this go round is that I uncontrollably cry (not hysterically) after each time I get sick, so I was constantly blotting at my eyes in the hopes that no one thought I was nuts.

I have since eaten, napped, and feel a little better.(actually napped first, after taking another zofran and passing out before I could bring it back up.)  I am fairly sure I am starting my 10th week soon, so the final countdown begins - the end of the gaggy era.  CAN I GET A WITNESS!?!


Now I just need to get to bed at a decent hour so I don't go back to work tomorrow all fucked up. We'll see how that goes. Punky B was very sweet earlier when her grandpa brought her home. Cuddling, talking to the belly, saying hi to the baby and telling him she loved him. "I am going to be your big sister! HELLO! I love you, Baby!" She's such a little sweet potato.

Pregnancy Post 18

so, the crazy prego dreams have set in. the first few were spectacular. the ones last night? not so much.

in the first one i miscarried. in the second one i went into preterm labor, and the drs weren't concerned and said there was nothing they could do...basically 'oh, well, too bad' and refused to take care of me. the baby crowned, and i pulled her out myself, but wouldn't let anyone cut the cord so she could keep getting oxygen until a nurse or doctor came back. (but before i pulled her out, i sat there for hours waiting for a nurse or someone to return...i was in denial that they had given up on us.) then she had meconium coming out of her ears,  she had teeth, and lots of hair. no one helped me clean her up, so i did it myself, and then wandered the halls with her begging for someone to check her out and make sure she was ok.

i know they are just dreams. but i am doing my damndest to think positively and not worry, and chiz like that doesn't help. after i got out of the shower this morning i sat on my bed and cried for a few minutes.

....they are just dreams. i know. i do. i just hope i don't have anymore.

at least my nausea is getting better. it doesn't really kick in now until lunch time, and then gets worse after i get home. but it's better than 24/7 nastiness.

Pregnancy Post 17

I felt human for about 45 collective minutes today, which is about 44.5 more than yesterday.

When I woke up this morning, I wasn't hit by the insta-nausea, and instantly got a little panicky thinking that something was amiss. But by the time I got to work I was as green as ever, which was oddly comforting.

The little seabiscuit is still in there, growing away, methinks.


We've already hit a standstill in the name department, mainly because we had the perfect girl name, and then found out my OB and her partner had a girl last year, and guess what they named her? but, i'm cool like fonzie for now. because thinking about the nub being a him still terrifies me, and thinking about it being a her stresses me out because of the name situation. so that train of thought can sit on the back burner for another 8 weeks or so until we see what's goings on in the gender department.

Pregnancy Post 16

first official appointment yesterday.

the nubbin is 1.8 centimeters, and the heartbeat was strong!

today i am 8 wks and 5 days, which i am hoping translates into only 3 or so more weeks of the rough stuff, and then i can get back to feeling human.

thankfully my family is quite adept at dealing with this rollercoaster. even punky b. when i had my meltdown the other day after vomiting for the millionth time, she got in my lap, rubbed my back and my face,  told me it was all going to be ok and sang to me.

Pregnancy Post 15

I both vomited and cried more than any one person should in a day today. I'm spent.